When Your Dreams Die Away

sunset from the house window, Picton


When you're sitting alone
In the midst of despair
And you're watching your dreams die away
And your heart fills with grief
As you see your dreams fade
And to God you so desperately say

"Oh Father, you planned this?!?!?!?!
Tell me, how can it be
That your plans were so different to mine!
Did it not seem to you
That my dreamings and hopes
Were actually wonderfully fine?" 

Let me ask you this question
Then you'll see more clearly
Why your visions and dreams did not fire
Did you build up your plans
In accordance with God's?
Or were they based on your own desire?

As hard as it is we

Must look at the rubbish

Of all of our crushed aspirations

We must pick up the bits

And take them to the cross

And say, "Lord, I had good intentions!"

"My desires were based

On the wrong thought that I

Could govern my life better than you

Please, God, patch up my heart

Draw me back to Yourself

Show me all that You want me to do

I know that my notions

Are flawed, human objects.

Please keep working on my heart until

I can cheerfully say

(without kicking or screaming)

My desire, Lord - to follow Your will."

PS. Today's my fantastic Dad's birthday!!! He's turning *mumble mumble* years old!! How awesome is that. Happy birthday, Daddy. You're the best Dad I've ever had.