Thursday, 28 September 2017

So. Um. Yes. It appears I'm not gone for good after all. (a.k.a. Story time with Bonnie)

*creeps in*

*looks around*

Is anyone here? Anyone still hanging round these days?? After I went and ditched you all....?

You are still here? oh goody, because have I got a bit of a story to share with you all! So have a seat, make yourself nice and comfy, grab a cup of hot chocolate (preferably with one or two marshmellows) and enjoy the story.  You ready? Well, ready or not, here we go.....

on with the story...

So I  have this friend whose name is David.

Anyway, part way through last year, I began to get 'vibes' that he liked me.

I liked David very much as a friend and enjoyed getting to know him better over a period of several months.  Eventually, in August sometime, David expressed his desire to begin a 'courtship' or 'intentional relationship'.  He discussed this both with my parents and with me.

I didn't say yes.

This was because I was about to head off to the United States for 2 and a half months and I didn't want to feel like I was leaving half my heart in New Zealand.  I wanted to enjoy my time over there and decided that I would revisit the idea when I came home at the end of January.  Mum and Dad also thought it would be a good idea to leave the idea on the shelf for the time being.

Fast forward to when I was away.  While I was in the US, I prayed about the idea of a relationship with David lots and thought about it a heap.  I was still in (relatively frequent) contact with David - we facebook messaged often and video called a few times.

Throughout the time I was away, I eventually came to the conclusion that I thought it was best to say no once and for all.  There were a few reasons for this decision which I am not going to go into here.  Suffice it to say I didn't have peace about it (my reasons were a bit more substantial than this) and I didn't feel that the timing was right.

So sometime in January I sent David a long email telling him all about it and what I wanted to do - namely, to just be friends.  I even offered to help him find someone else!  We were really good friends and I didn't want to break our friendship, but I didn't want him to think I was happy to marry him, because at the time I really couldn't see that happening.

David was gutted, poor guy.

I felt terrible dashing his hopes like that (and I didn't find it easy myself!), but I justified it by telling myself and him that it was better for us to break up then than further down the track when we were both far more emotionally invested.

Then I came home to New Zealand and life resumed again.

I began studying the last paper in the Legal Executive diploma and got a full time job not too long after that.  Life was really busy and I was enjoying it.

It so happened that the job I got (as a legal secretary in a law firm in the central city) was only a few hundred meters away from David's work (he's currently a service desk support person at a computer / IT company).  It's true - I walk out of my building, walk down the road, turn a corner and his building is pretty much right there!

We would often bang into each other going for a walk on our lunch breaks.  We also were still in contact and were in several of the same friend groups, including the camp leaders group, so we saw each other at things like that.  We ended up planning kid's camp together and occasionally if my other transport options didn't work out I would get a ride in to work with David.

For months we were just good friends.  I knew it was really hard for David because he wanted to be more than friends and didn't give up hope that I would change my mind.  Yet I stuck to my guns and would suggest other girls that he could consider (none of whom he really seriously considered).  I saw myself just as a good friend but nothing more.

I kept thinking to myself, "things can't stay like this forever".  Either I needed to change my mind and decide I wanted to be in a relationship, or else David needed to change his mind and set his hopes on someone else.  I hated the feeling of being in limbo, of it feeling like something had to snap.  I kept seeking God and thinking about the situation.  Both of us were praying that God would change one of our hearts.

And you know what?

He changed mine.

Over the last few months (probably from mid July onwards) I just kind of started to slowly fall in love with David.  I'm sure it was God changing my heart.  I got a few random little 'confirmations' that made me know for sure that I was making the right decision.  My whole outlook on the situation changed.  All the reasons why I had originally told him No were either sorted out or don't really matter that much.

And so I was left with no more excuses and a new appreciation for this man of God who kept pursuing me when I had consistently stubbornly refused him.

Let's talk about this man of God for a minute shall we! :)

He is 21 years old and lives about half an hour away from me and my family.  His family (he comes from a family of 11 children as well) has been friends with ours for as long as I can remember.
He has an incredibly strong faith and always encourages me in mine. Just like David in the Bible, he really is a "man after God's own heart".
He's really gentle and kind.
He's a lover of Truth.
He is a man of integrity who stands up for what is right.  I know that I never have to worry about his character.
He is passionate and persistent in pursuing what he believes in.
He's really good with kids.
And he's really handsome too. :)

Now that you know him a bit better, I'll continue with the story.

David says he started picking up on some vibes I apparently was sending that I was starting to be a bit more 'interested' than I had been.  I don't know about that, but I do know that we eventually decided the time had come to discuss where our 'relationship' (or lack of it) was at.

We went for a walk on our lunch breaks on the 10th of August and discussed it.

And after we had both shared where we were at, and talked about it all, we stopped on a bridge above a river with daffodils and blossom covered trees lining the banks.  And David officially asked me if I wanted to be his girlfriend.

And I said yes.

And it's that happening (and the events following) that prompted me to write this blog post.

We are officially in a relationship.  Or courtship.  Call it whatever you like, but we are in a relationship with the intention of marriage in the future.

And I couldn't be more happy. :)

David seems pretty happy too.  Which is rather a pleasant state of affairs for everyone involved.

This is an exciting stage of life and a part of the journey that neither of us have travelled before.  We are so enjoying getting to know each other better and better.  And developing those little 'inside jokes'.  And just really finding the whole adventure of love so exciting!

So yeah.  That's where we are at currently!

Hope you all are having a great week. :)

Love to you all,