Sunday, 31 July 2016

dear teenage girl of today

When I saw you laugh at the vulgar, crass and crude, I was saddened.

When I saw you walking down the road flirtatiously eyeing every male that passed you, I was saddened.

When I saw you wearing things that would have been seen as scandalous when our parents and grandparents were growing up, I was saddened.

When I watched how you acted towards your parents, grandparents and towards your siblings, I was saddened.

When I saw the lack of respect and absence of such beautiful virtures as humility, generosity, patience, love and kindness, I was saddened.

When I saw the way you treated boyfriends as trophies, and things to play with and show off, and not real people with hearts, desires, fears and feelings of their own, I was saddened.

When I saw the extremely rude way you treated my co worker the other day at work when she was tired and had had a long day, I was saddened.

When I saw you whispering and giggling together and pointing at that old lady walking past who was having a bad hair day, I was saddened.

When I watched you shove past each other and the small children in order to be first on the bus so you could get a good seat, I was saddened.

You see, dear girl, your behaviour reflects on the rest of us.

I don't think I'm being prudish and stupid and not-with-the-times when I say that your actions are often obscene, ridiculous and disrespectful. I'm saddened when I see how you act, how you dress, how you speak.

I, too, am a female of today. And when I see you acting in this way I can't help but be saddened because I know that this is how society views teenage girls. Silly, giggly creatures who are only interested in boys and makeup. But what happened to make society view teenage girls this way? I have a feeling that as you began to act this way, society began to view you this way.

What happened to sensibility? What happened to respect for the elderly and authorities? What happened to being kind and sweet and gracious?

Why do you have to sacrifice kindness for stupidity?

I praise the Lord that not all teenage girls are like you. I know many wonderful teenage girls who refuse to participate in the gossip and sass and rudeness to others. Yet there are many of you and I fear your behaviour is starting to invade the girls younger and younger.

When I see you trading decency for indecency, kindness for rudeness, being nice for being obscene and respect for disrespect, it not only saddens me, but it breaks my heart.

Society was never meant to be this way. God made us to be a loving daughter, then to be a loving wife, then to be a loving mother, then a loving grandmother and so on. Not to intersperse loving daughter and loving wife with 'ridiculous, insensible, tasteless, coarse and unhelpful rebel-of-a-teenage girl'.

Please don't think I think I'm better than you when I say that your actions are ridiculous. I am simply concerned for our society and think that something must have gone terribly wrong for your character and your actions to be so accepted!

It shouldn't be like this.

a teenage girl of today who thinks sensibility shouldn't be a thing of the past

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PS. HAPPY BIRTHDAY to my lovely, sweet, kind, gentle, hilarious sister Sophie who is turning a sweet 16 today! (This post wasn't directed at you, Soph. You know that, right? You do? Phew.) Hope  your birthday is fabulous. Many blessings on this next year of your life.


  1. Haha, thanks for the Happy birthday sis! :) Your beautiful! <3

  2. This was very good Bonnie! I think one of your points really struck a cord, because I have observed it too many times to count: Treating boys with disrespect. This usually happens for attention and teasing with rudeness many times is mistaken for being "playful."I understand good-humor is appropriate, but very few young people have the discernment to be good-natured and respectful, vs. sarcastic and rude. Err on the side of caution I say. From personal experience I found that many (not all) guys will treat you with respect, if you conduct yourself well and are not disrespectful. Besides, being a kind person is not as hard as many people (with sarcastic bents) make it out. I know it can be hard to be kind sometimes, but its not always torture!

    1. You make excellent points. Thank you for sharing!
      Yes, it is very easy to fall into the trap of treating boys with disrespect. At work I get to see this first hand - we get lots of high school kids coming after school for some food. I see the girls hanging off their boyfriends and acting extremely disrespectfully and inappropriately towards them while their friends egg them on.
      Erring on the side of caution is such a good way to look at it. I confess I was a little convicted reading your comment - you mentioned sarcasm and that is one thing I can find quite easy to do! Thanks for the reminder and I'm so glad you found my post interesting.

  3. Oh, I love this post. I have been noticing this for quite some time now, and it saddens me as well. Wonderful post! Thank you, Bonnie! ♥

    ~Megan <333

    1. Awww, you're so kind, Megan. So nice to know that there are other people out there who have been noticing and thinking the same thing.
      Have a blessed day!

  4. Wonderful post again, Bonnie! <3 I love the way you write things like this. It's a sad but true representative of a lot of teenage girls today- but thankfully, there are still some wonderful Christian girls spreading positive examples, including you! ;)

    1. Thanks, Emily!
      Awwww, you're so sweet... I'm so thrilled I'm counted amongst the positive examples. If through my blog God gets glorified that's what I'm doing it for so I'm happy. :)

  5. Replies
    1. :) So thrilled to know other people have the same opinions.

  6. Dear Bonnie...oh, this was an excellent post! Truly, I thoroughly enjoyed what you shared... My heart has been greatly burdened over the past few years just observing the way of the teenage girl of today. You are right, society views us as giggly, gossping, silly girls and oh! This is not what Christ would have us be! I am thankful to have a handful of dear, special friends and sisters who realise there is a better way and strive to please the Lord through their actions. It is beautiful to see indeed and a stark contrast to the majority of teen girls. And now I am praying for the next young ladies coming through...dear Lord, please protect them and keep them away from those who will influence them in a negative way! They are so precious, young and vulnerable!
    Bonnie, I truly appreciated your words..they were piercing but written in grace!
    And the happiest of birthdays to your lovely sister, Sophia! My sister is also 16 now! {{Smiles}}
    Have a wonderful week, Bonnie! And thank you for so kindly visiting my blog...I look forward to a friendship with you here!

    1. Dear Kelly-Anne,
      Wow, it's always a joy to read your lovely, thoughtful comments. I'm so glad you feel the same way. I agree - this is not what Christ would have us be!
      Thank you for your kind words. I'll pass on your birthday wishes to Sophie.
      Have a wonderful week, yourself! :) Blessings and a hug!

    2. Thanks for the birthday wishes Kelly-Anne!!! <3
      Many Blessings,

  7. This totally resounds with me. I see this everywhere and it is really sad, but it also has inspired me to do the very best I can. And to try influence younger girls in the right way and be the role model they need so they don't become like those silly girls.

    Seeing my childhood friends turn into normal teenage girls inspired me to start a bible study (Bright Lights) group for young girls to teach them what the bible says we should live like, and even though I have only been doing this for a little over a year there have been some changes, good changes in these younger girls lives. And they do have me to look up to which is kinda terrifying, but also enables me to bless them so much.

    1. Clare, I love that after seeing things like this you've actually been inspired to make a difference. Good on you!

      The Bible study sounds awesome! I love that you've seen good changes in their lives. What you're doing is for eternal value - don't discount the impact you are making! Praise the Lord for what He's doing.


  8. Amen! I love this post! We definitely should be living to be an influence on the younger girls in our lives as well.

    Allie D.

    1. Fantastic! Yep, it is awesome when seeing problems in the world we are motivated to make a difference and BE the change.


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