Friday, 5 April 2013

For goodness sakes, Bonnie!

For goodness sakes, Bonnie! I was telling someone off recently for not posting regularly because they didn't know what to post, and now I find I'm doing the same thing for the same reason!

Tut tut. *shakes finger at self*

So I'll do the same thing I told someone else to do, and that is, when you have nothing to post, post jokes!
*cheers* yay! I get to post jokes! (I should do this more often!)

A photographer for a national magazine was assigned to take pictures of a great forest fire. He was advised that a small plane would be waiting to fly him over the fire. 

The photographer arrived at the airstrip just an hour before sundown. Sure enough, a small Cessna aeroplane was waiting. He jumped in with his equipment and shouted, "Let's go!" The tense man sitting in the pilot's seat swung the plane into the wind and soon they were in the air, though flying erratically. 

"Fly over the north side of the fire," said the photographer, "And make several low-level passes." 

"Why?" asked the nervous pilot. 

"Because I'm going to take pictures!" yelled the photographer. "I'm a photographer, and photographers take pictures!" 
The pilot replied, "You mean you're not the flight instructor?"  

The night before one exam, two students accidentally managed to sleep through the final. They realised they were in serious trouble, so they agreed to tell the professor that they had a flat tire on the way to the exam. 

``No problem." said the Professor, ``Come by my office at 5 P.M. and I'll give you the exam then." 

Feeling pretty clever, the students spent the intervening time getting information on the exam from students who had already taken it, and making sure they knew how to do the problems. Coming to the professor's office that evening, they were told, ``Leave your books in my office, and I'll put you in two separate rooms for the exam." They were both ecstatic to see that the Professor had given them the exact same exam taken by the class that morning. However, there was an additional page tacked on the end, upon which was written,

``For 50% of the grade, which tire was flat?"

An elderly couple was watching television one evening. The wife said, "I am going to get a dish of ice cream now." Kindly, the husband offered to get the ice cream for his wife. "I'll write it down so you don't forget," she said. 

"I won't forget," the old gent said. "But, I want chocolate syrup and nuts on it. So, I'll write it down," she replied. 

"I will get you the ice cream. Don't you worry," replied the gentleman. 

A few minutes later, the old man returned with bacon and eggs. His wife said, "See, I should have written it down because you forgot the toast."    


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